SALVATION....
This is what I will be doing in the upcoming days/weeks...etc.
Wednesday November 5: Supergrass
FINALLY -----> Saturday November 8: ORIGINAL! Northern soulcialist all-nighter. Soul, original ska, rocksteady, mod '77 in entrambe le sale con i dj's della DTK + guests
Saturday November 29: THE FAINT
Monday December 15: DEERHOOF
I must admit, I've been in a foul mood lately. A total state of malaise. It's no one's fault but my own. I feel strange at school -- physically, emotionally, mentally; almost like high school. Don't get me wrong, I like everyone there, just that I don't feel like I fit and I don't know what it is that I'm looking for -- no one has been un-welcoming -- on the contrary, unlike high school, everyone has been friendly and inviting, it's just that I find so few people that 'get it'. If I want to have a conversation on politics or school, it's easy. But frankly, I'm bored with it -- I hate going to parties and the only thing I can find to talk about are classes and politics. It's funny because it's contrasts with my attitude back home where I had few outlets for academic peers that I could stand, but everyone who I did hang out with shared my sense of humor and style.
Style vs. Substance...style vs. substance...style vs. substance
Speaking of humor, here I feel like I have to censor myself or fear being taken seriously -- people seem to care about feelings and reputations; I guess I'm numb that way. I've always known that it's hard to find a happy medium. Here I feel so out of place. Yeah, it feels slightly akin to high school -- I've said it a few times before -- a) I don't fit in and b) I alienate those few who are close to me... all I need is c) to be in a crappy band playing crappy Joy Division covers, and the circle will be complete.
It worries be because I can see all of this having a negative affect on my school work. Everything on the periphery has been infringing on my ability to negotiate through life's obstacles. So much so that, considering everything in the background, the school work IS the easy stuff -- it's a constant and, to some calculable extent, I know what to expect and how to deal with it. I haven't been getting much sleep and I can't explain why. No matter how tired I am, I can't seem to go to bed before 2 and I always wake up at 8. zzz.zzz.zzz
